Living in Pink

One of those moments .....

2011-04-06T20:14:00.001-04:00

This afternoon Emma & Kailee were upstairs cleaning their room. After a while Kailee came downstairs and told me she needed to tell me something. So I asked her, "good or bad" and she said, she wasn't sure how I was going to react.

She told me that Christopher (in her class) asked her today during play time to be her girlfriend!! I asked her what she said and she told me very matter of fact that she said she had to think about it! I thought that was PERFECT. I was so proud of her. I was even more proud that she felt confident enough to speak to her sister about it, and then Emma told her she should talk to me.

I am so happy and proud of them. In the end we talked some more about it and she told me that when she thinks about Christopher saying those words she gets nervous and excited at the same time, so I explained to her that those are good feelings. She sat around and thought about it some more and then decided that she will say Yes to being Christopher's girlfriend!!

I think it's so sweet and funny at the same time. I can only hope and pray that when this happens again 10 years from now that she will still have the confidence to tell a boy who asks her out that she needs to think about it first and then come home and talk to me and Emma about it.

This was one of those moments that make it all worth while.

Here's a picture of Christopher & Kailee:

First Post of 2011

2011-02-05T08:19:00.006-05:00

I CANNOT believe that I haven't posted since November!! That's awful, but it's been crazy here since November. We've had holidays and major snow storms and the girls were sick like crazy off and on for about 8 weeks. INSANITY!!

We are home right now instead of at basketball because it was CANCELED due to weather. We have not had a full week of school since Christmas break, every week has contained a snow day or delayed opening or BOTH!

Here are some pictures from the past few weeks, I will add Christmas pictures soon.

Good comes out of Emma being sick?

2010-11-28T18:21:00.002-05:00

I hate to admit it, but I seem to always find the happy ending or silver lining. Hating to admit it doesn't make sense either, cause I don't hate it. It just always seems to surprise me.

Emma is my helper, I rely on her way to much but she's always there to listen to me or help. With her being sick, Kailee willingly stepped up to the plate and proved to herself what I always knew was possible. She is very capable and is a great helper.

Aside from that Kailee is always with Emma. They are best friends and blessed for me, they hardly ever fight. Somehow, Gabby doesn't really fit in to their little group. This past week, Kailee & Gabby only had each other. Now, they do not play the same way as Emma & Kailee but they played. Gabby really loves her big sister. She loves to rough house with her and pull her hair and dance and sing. They really have a lot in common which is so nice to see despite their age difference. Kailee even loves to play with Gabby's toys, which may not be a good thing for Gabby but they found ways to occupy themselves.

Having 3 kids sick at the same time is horrible. One of them being a 2 year old who is not capable of doing anything or speaking is torture, add to that a mushy 5 year old and a very sick 6 year old and you have one exhausted mama. Poor Emma couldn't even get a hug when she was sick until two days ago when Gabby felt better. My arms are full always but this week they hurt. My hurt was hurting also because I feel that Emma could have gotten better so much faster if there was some Mama love time involved while she was sick, if she could have layed her head in my lap longer or just slept in my arms. The power of Mama love is so strong, and I believe it does have healing powers!

Birthday, Turkey & Sick

2010-11-26T21:25:00.002-05:00

What a week we had! I'm so glad that it's only Friday night and there is still two days left of this weekend to recover.

We've been going non stop since last Saturday, when we had a few people over to celebrate Gabrielle's 2nd birthday! I can't believe my baby girl is 2, it really hit me when we sang Happy Birthday to her that it was the last 2 year old party I'll ever get to host for one of my children. Such mixed emotions!

Sunday we had Lou's Aunt's 60th birthday party, and then Monday was Gabrielle's actual birthday. Things went down hill from there though. She started not to feel well Monday night, by Tuesday morning is was down right sick. Tuesday afternoon I got to go to school to be a part of Kailee's Thanksgiving feast, then came home and did homework with the girls. By the time dinner rolled around and was done, Emma was sick.

We started our Thanksgiving vacation a day early by keeping both girls home from school which was good cause Emma was sick all day and Kailee got sick at night. We then decided to post-pone Thanksgiving and Lou's bday. So sad the girls spent all of Thanksgiving on the couch sick.

Today was much better for Kailee and Gabrielle, but poor Emma is still down for the count. Gabby is also being weaned which has been a bit of a hassle for her and I but I'm sticking to it! We're now on day 3 of no breast milk. I'm hoping it will get easier soon. She is a tough cookie that's for sure!

We celebrated Thanksgiving and Lou's bday today as well as put up our Christmas tree, I just feel so bad that Emma couldn't participate in any of it, she tried so hard to put some decorations on the tree but just couldn't do it for long.

Hoping tomorrow is a better day for all of us!

Continuing on my random thoughts

2010-11-15T18:51:00.001-05:00

My last post was about the 5 glass balls, and I feel that I didn't even get to say half of the things that are swirling in my head.

One of the balls mentioned is Work. That is a RUBBER ball, that is the one that has the most flexibility. What happens when your household and your children are your work? There are no sick days, no vacation days, no "I don't feel like it" days, what do you do then, how do you make that a rubber ball, when everything you are responsible for is as important as glass?

I feel a new me emerging and I'm not sure where it's going to take me, but I think it's a fork in the road and I'm feeling pressure to make changes and decisions. I'm unhappy, and unhealthy, and I'm not being the best me, which is not being the best mom or role model for my girls.

Where do I go from here?

Random Thoughts

2010-11-10T15:57:00.003-05:00

I just read James Patterson's = Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas, and I am sure that I am very late in reading this book as it's been around a long time, but needless to say it's left an impression.

This is a quote from the book:

Imagine that life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The five balls are: family, friends, health, integrity, and work. And you are keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that "work" is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four---family, friends, health, and integrity---are made of glass. And if you drop them, they will crack, chip, or shatter. Once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will discover balance in your life ---James Patterson

This is major food for thought for me. I have neglected my health, badly. Not just badly, embarrassingly. I am an advocate for NOT missing a child health care appointment and never allowing them to go untreated. My mantra was always that I have to take care of my children and then it dawned on me, that taking care of MYSELF IS taking care of my children, because if I get sick or can't be here for them, what good am I then to them or to myself?

With all that said, I went to the dr. yesterday for the first time in ages, aside from being pregnant or my annual GYN appointment. I met a brand new wonderful woman doctor who spent and unheard of 1 hour with me, talking!! It was amazing and felt great. I had to go for lots of blood work today but I'm okay with whatever comes of it and wherever it leads me to take care of me.

Number one is that I must loose weight, lots of it, so I have to put myself out there and make myself a priority. That is not an easy thing for me, I've put myself on the back burner for so long and now it's time for a change, a change for the better, a change for me, a change that will affect everyone around me!

Many Things Are Different

2010-10-03T11:04:00.002-04:00

I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. So say I'm busy is an understatement. The days all blend into one another and often I'm so tired I can't even sleep.

Now it's Fall. I'm so glad the fall is here! That's one of the big changes for me. I've forever been a fan of summer and all that entails, Heat. Humidity. Beach. Pool. Long Days. Long Nights. Laying on a towel listening to the radio. Sitting by the pool for hours with my favorite book. I used to live for all of those things, for those 3 amazing months out of the year, my favorite. Then it changed...

Emma came along and I still couldn't wait for all of those things to share with her but for her first summer she was only 2 months old, so I looked forward to the next year, then I was very very pregnant with Kailee.

That summer flew by and the following year I couldn't wait for the beach and the pool and the summer. Then I realized how not fun all those things were anymore in the same way I used to define fun. Now there was the OBSESSION with SUN SCREEN, not just any sunscreen, sunscreen so strong you were not getting a sunburn let alone a tan. And this included lotion for myself, another thing that I never even thought about before the girls.

Then came getting to the beach. OMG!! All the stuff to pack, the sand everywhere, the crying children, the BUGS, the food getting dirty, the danger of the children running in the crowd or towards the water.

The pool was a little easier, but the pool for me represented going in swimming a few laps and going back to my towel in the sun. Now it was about sitting in the kiddie pool only and having to stay in the water way past the time of being comfortable to chase the girls around the water. EXHAUSTING!!!!!!!!!! Then getting back home and all the wet clothes and the mess and the running around to get all the stuff washed and packed for dare I say another trip to the pool. Sigh.

I can't believe I have started to dread the things I loved just because they are not the same any more. Not to say that I will not one day enjoy them again but that they have changed what they represent and that I have changed the way I feel about it.

I love my girls so much and enjoy doing things with them but there is so much that goes into simple tasks.

On a more child update note:

Gabby is going to be weaned soon, I cannot believe I've been nursing for 22 months, and I will continue until her second birthday.

She will also be transitioned into her new big girl bed in her own room, and I'm considering potty training! My baby is growing up.

Kailee is A.M.A.Z.I.N.G. She loves Kindergarten and we are blessed with Mrs. Palisay again. We are going to work to get her back into OT and if classification of her is necessary to get her the help she needs then that is what will be done, it can only benefit it, it cannot harm her.

Emma is growing way to fast. She is beautiful and smart and compasionate, but sadly she is a jealous little monster when it comes to "things". That makes me sad but I guess it's something we all go through and have to work on.

I will do my best to continue blogging and will even work on getting some pictures uploaded.

Do you know who is in my bed right now?

2010-06-23T07:31:00.001-04:00

Emma!!! I don't remember the last time she got in bed with us, and last night of all nights is so amazing to me because she turned 6! She has shown nothing but independence and maturity the past few months that having her in bed with us for almost the entire night is actually a treat.

I don't remember how long it's been since I've gotten to lay next to her or best of all get to watch her sleep. Her and Gabby are currently sleeping head to head in the middle of Lou and I! It's so beautiful and peaceful.

I still can't believe that 6 years ago I was only a mom for 10 hours, and here we are now 6 years later, time goes so fast once you have children and it is the one thing that I always wish I had more of.

She finished her first year of Kindergarten yesterday also, and as glad as I am that the schleping and getting up early and making lunch and doing homework is over the end is still bittersweet, the teachers were all a bit sad because they are going to miss the girls that were in their classes and care for the past 10 months, that to me is amazing.

Gabby is pretty funny also she is running and laughing and developing and incredible personality, she never fails to make me smile or fill my heart with "that feeling" that is indescribable.

Kailee has grown and matured so much also, Pre-K was great for her and she has shown so much improvement and will continue to flourish with the right guidance from both me and school. I'm looking forward to watching her grow more and more everyday!

Pictures will be added (eventually), I've been really bad with being on the computer lately, there's just to much fun stuff to do with the beautiful weather we've been having!!

Memorial Day Weekend 2010

2010-05-30T20:00:00.008-04:00

I remember years ago looking forward to Memorial Day weekend. I couldn't wait for the start of summer. The beach, the suntan lotion, hanging with friends or just enjoying a good book. The 3 day weekend.

Then I had the girls and it changed. All the things I loved, I now dreaded. The sunscreen times 3 kids, worrying about insects, eating sand, getting stung or sunburned, not liking the beach or the water. And not getting to sit in my chair in the sun reading a book or taking a nap. It was no longer fun.

This weekend though it started to reverse again, and it was fun. I filled up the kiddie pool and cleaned off the toys, I sunscreened all four of us and out to the yard we headed. We only last an hour and a half, which for me is a record since I've had the kids. (Gabby is not really thrilled with walking in the grass or a pool filled with cold water, but I'm guessing by the end of the summer that will not be the case).

Emma & Kailee had fun in the pool and I enjoyed swinging on the big double swing with Gabby next to me, and can you believe it? People magazine and I got to read a few pages of it!!

I loved them being babies but each day as they grow and get more independent I love the ages that they are at. Some days it's really hard to have two independent school kids and a toddler who doesn't talk but on the whole it's pretty good.

Emma made breakfast for us this morning while I was outside cleaning the pool toys. She made us each a waffle and toasted them (twice) and put butter on them so it was ready and waiting for me when I got inside. It was so sweet!

And to top it off, Emma lost her 3rd tooth. I have one crying from teething and one loosing teeth at the same rate!

First Sleep Over

2010-05-19T09:44:00.002-04:00

Gabby finally had her first sleep over. We went to Aunt Carol & Uncle Jerry's for the weekend and it was great!

Gabby was a bit cranky because of her bottom eye teeth finally breaking through, but otherwise she had a great time.

The girls were amazing!! They played outside and were an absolute dream. They had fun on the Wii, and playing in the yard, or hiking in the woods with Joey, who they lovingly called Uncle Jerry's brother for most of the weekend until they were brave enough on Sunday to actually call him by his name.

The were super eaters also. On Friday, they had chicken cutlets and and on Saturday it was BBQ day, they were so excited by the first BBQ of the season that I figured they weren't going to eat, but did they ever, they actually surprised me. Emma ate a hot dog and corn on the cob, Kailee requested the left over chicken cutlets, and then went on to eat 2 hot dogs!!

Sunday we left amid tears and begging to stay but we promised that we will go up for a week in the summer (at least the girls and I will), which I am undoubtedly looking forward to because it is so comfortable and peaceful up there, and I too hate to leave.

Yesterday I woke up feeling under the weather and Emma was coughing also so I decided that it was going to be a rainy day at home, no school, only pj's and movies. It worked out well. I didn't get to rest much having them home but it was better than watching the clock. Dinner time came around and I wasn't in much of a mood to cook but I was hungry so I had to come up with a plan.

Kailee requested grilled cheese, easy, done! Emma requested a ham and cheese sandwich, and I needed to come up with something for me and Gabby since she can't have grilled cheese.

In the meantime, I decided to make some macaroni and butter for Gabby, and came up with a tuna pasta salad for myself.

Emma made her own sandwich and even cut it in half. Then Emma proceeded to make my Tuna salad. She emptied the cans of tuna, mashed it up, added garlic powder, mayo and lemon juice, then we tossed in some pasta and some crunchy toast, she mixed it all up and served it to me!

It was delicious!

The girls are home again today and I'm still feeling lousy. Emma just made herself and Kailee a waffle, I'm amazed at how much she can do, she never stops surprising me, and although some days are harder than others, her independence and capababilities make other areas a lot easier!

Long Time No Blogging

2010-04-22T09:53:00.002-04:00

My goodness what I terrible blogger I have been! There is many things to catch up on and I don't know where to begin.

The girls are doing great, driving me crazy and learning new things every day. Gabby has quite a personality and makes me laugh 99.9% of the time. She is 17 months old today and we are still nursing!!

She loves her food and is a wonderful eater, she's walking every where and loves her sisters so much, she follows them everywhere and wants to play with them and loves them so much.

She's pretty good at entertaining herself but loves to come up and give me a hug every so often. She isn't talking much but imitates and follows instructions really well. She's 19 pounds and 30 inches! She is still wearing 6-9 months clothes but the doctor said it's all good, she's a fire-cracker, a great eater and learning and growing right on target.

I hope to blog more often I and will post pictures soon!

gabby eating.MPG

2010-02-26T09:56:00.001-05:00

Feeding Gabrielle is always fun, check out her crunchy waffle!

gabby madagascar.MPG

2010-02-25T18:25:00.001-05:00

All three girls love the Madagascar 2 movie! Gabby loves to dance to the end of it!

toofers.MPG

2010-02-25T18:22:00.001-05:00

Check out all of Gabby's teeth!

Groundhog's Day

2010-02-16T16:01:00.002-05:00

I would venture to guess that every stay at home mother, or even retiree, has compared their every day routine or rut to the movie Groundhog's Day. I think about it often and how it applies to my life.

There really isn't a way to avoid it, babies are very routine oriented and it makes things much easier for all parties to have a routine. As the children get older a routine is comforting, this way there is anticipation on the child's part and on the family's part.

This has worked for the most part for us all the time. Believe it or not I have the hardest part adjusting to a change in my routine. I love knowing what will be happening when and straying from it is very difficult for me. I haven't always been this way, I was much more flexible when the kids were little but now that I have 3 of them and they are older it's easier to know what's coming next.

I'm still having so much difficulty adjusting to school life, I hate the rigidity of it, but that is like double talking myself when I say how I love a daily routine. I hate watching the clock and doing the homework and picking up and dropping off and getting clothes out and making lunches, it is just so uncomfortable for me.

Anyway, this year Groundhog's Day was anything but predictable, Lou was rushed to the hospital for chest pains. I couldn't believe it, I didn't know what to do and I reacted and handled the situation terribly. I was so upset and confused and scared and didn't know "where I belonged". I didn't know how to tend to my husband and take care of my children. Luckily I had help and it worked out and he's okay. He was home with us for just under 2 weeks and the routine changed and we all loved having him home, but now I can't get back into the swing of things, and I don't know what the heck is going on with me.

On another note, the girls got their report cards on Friday and both did well. Emma did better than well, and we have some things to work on with Kailee, all in good time. Gabby is walking much more often and moving much faster it's really funny to watch, I really just wish she'd talk a bit more she is so determined to grunt and groan and whine and gets what she wants so I've started to be a little bit more stern with her and not answer her or give her what I know she wants, I'm trying to encourage her to speak more. She follows instructions and understands what we tell her she just isn't verbal. All she says is HI all day long!

Emma is home sick today, poor baby has some kind of stomache bug, not throwing up thank goodness, just running back and forth to the bathroom. Gabby seems to have the same bug, I'd much rather change diapers and sit in the bathroom than have them vomiting! Emma missed the 100th day of school celebration today, and of course she is spotlight this week and we completed her project yesterday she couldn't wait to bring it in today, it's not bad enough she was chosen the week that school only had 4 days but now will be absent for 2 of those 4, I feel bad for her!

Well I guess that's all for now, I'll try to post more and add some pictures soon, I've just been feeling so out of touch lately that it's been difficult to do anything extra than the things I have to do.

The Food Wars

2010-01-31T18:17:00.002-05:00

I know that I was the worst eater as a child but it doesn't make it better or even okay to have to deal with it when it's your own child. It's really frustrating and tiring and annoying.

There is no doubt in my mind for one second that I am to blame for being lazy, tired, bored, not a good eater myself, not taking risks with offering foods, but now I'm just done.

I DREAD meal time, almost every single one, every single day. Emma is awful. Not even a little bit, just awful, I hate going to other peoples homes with her, I hate sending her to play dates, I just hate eating with her. Hate is such a strong word, maybe dread is better. I dread it. On several occassions I have tried the you have to eat whatever is around and if you only eat dessert that's up to you, but that was a reward. I now pack food for her. There are certain places I can go where I don't worry about it, but other places I will either get her McDonalds or pack her food. I have packed her food on several play dates to make it easier for her and the people hosting the play date.

She has go to foods, cereal, pancakes, pizza,bread and butter, bagels, bananas, pizza, McD's cheeseburger, but other than that it stinks, it really stinks when we want to go out to eat and can't because there's nothing on the menu that Emma will eat. There are a handful of restaurants that we can go to if mac and cheese is on the menu or grilled cheese (neither of these will she eat if I make), and it's reached the point where I don't even want to give her food anymore. She admitted to me today that even at lunch when I make her a cheese sandwhich she takes the cheese off and eats the bread and mayo. GROSS, but I understand, that's the part that kills me, I don't want her to end up looking and feeling like me. But I have created this monster and now I don't know what to do about it.

I know that I should just stop buying her comfort foods and replace them with things she likes but watching her choke down something she doesn't like brings back horrible memories for me and I don't want to do that to her, but at the same time I don't know what to do anymore.

Kailee is a more adventerous eater, she will TRY just about anything, not necessarily liking it but trying it none the same.

Gabrielle on the other hand eats everything I make and loves just about 99% of it all, thank God for somethings!

Itsy Bitsy Spider

2010-01-26T19:03:00.001-05:00

The past few days have been busy! Gabby loves the Itsy Bitsy Spider song and is learning the hand movements to go with it, it's really funny to watch her, I hope this video captures how funny it is!

Gabby's Walking!

2010-01-26T18:35:00.001-05:00

Finally able to get her in action on video! She is still mostly crawling but is taking more steps more often now throughout the day. Today she was even brave enough to drink and walk and carry some toys around with her!

14 months old

2010-01-24T09:40:00.002-05:00

14 months old has always been a big milestone for me. I really can't believe that I've reached that milestone for the last time. My little baby is 14 months old!

This is a big month age for me because that is how old Emma was when I had Kailee!! I look at Gabby and can't imagine that I had a newborn and a 14 month old! I would be able to handle it fine just like I did the first time around but when I really think about it, Gabby is so small and doesn't communicate well and is so dependent but yet independent.

When I look back, I think that Emma was more independent and I think she was talking a lot more than Gabby is but I'm not really sure. I have to try and hook up the old video camera and watch the videos of her and Kailee when they were small.

Gabby is imitating and learning more and more everyday. She has not walked again since last Saturday and that is fine, she'd rather hold the girls hands and walk with them than on her own.

She can do the itsy bitsy spider when I sing it and that brings back a ton of memories of Emma at this age also.

Kailee is doing wonderful! We had her evaluation meeting last Friday and everyone is in agreement over how much she has improved but we also do agree that she needs to continue with her OT and extra work to continue to improve and strengthen her movements to prepare her for Kindergarten. Kindergarten has a lot of writing involved and she is not ready for that much pencil and paper work. They have to reevaluate her because she is turning 5 but they expect her to be general education with related services which is not a doubt in my mind, she is above average in academics she just has the issue with her fine motor and gross motor skills. I am very happy with the outcome and look forward to enjoying her progress and successes!

We are official NJ Residents now! I have a drivers license and the car is registered and insured. It was not that big of a deal as I thought it was going to be. I have also finally gotten my first proof of identification in my married name! Considering we will be married 7 years in May I'd say it's about time.

I have been super busy around the house and loving it! I have gotten more projects done in the first 20 days of this year than I had in the past two years and it feels so good!

I have 1 or 2 really large projects to do but I have to really get in the mood to do them and I have had such good motivation in the past few weeks that I don't want to loose the momentum but I also know that if I force myself to tackle these projects they will not be done the proper way and I will feel as if it's more of a chore than a project I am looking forward to completeing and enjoying the benefits and releif of accomplishing it!

On another note, we are still nursing! 14 months and counting! I am so glad that I am still nursing but I see that the change is coming. We were out all day yesterday and we went 12 hours without nursing at all and we were both fine! I'm so glad, I'm thinking if I can string a few of those days together we'll be great and down to only nursing at night. The easier part of yesterday was because we were out all day and naps were taken in the car, not sure about today.

Her sleeping at night has become more independent and longer also, I'm thinking that we are getting 4-6 hour stretches with out snuggling or nursing and her sleeping in the center of the bed away from my stretched out on her belly. It's great! I'm looking forward to the possibility of sleeping straight through the night again, it's been a really long time for me since that happened.

Gabby is incredible! She brings such joy to me and I look at her and enjoy her so much, she has an incredible relationship with her sisters and a personality that knocks your socks off. She is a lot like Emma she always has paper and a pen or crayon near by!

And She's Off!!

2010-01-17T08:10:00.002-05:00

Gabby took a few steps yesterday towards Louie several times!! I am so filled with pride and sadness, my baby is growing up faster and faster yet again.

I am relieved to report that she is still mostly is crawling but I know time is up sooner rather than later for that!

I really wish she would have started talking before walking, the grunting, pointing and whining are way more frustrating than watching her crawl every where!!

Pictures and video will come eventually, I was too excited yesterday to even try to get it on video, maybe today will be the day!

Good Bye 2009

2009-12-31T14:20:00.003-05:00

Another DECADE is coming to an end. I cannot really believe that it's been 10 years since we celebrated the turn of the century. I cannot believe we are starting the decade in which my children will most likely remember the most.

I wonder what the future will bring. I am not wishing for anything. I am not promising myself anything. I would like to try to live my life to the fullest, eliminate the negative and enjoy the positive. My children are the greatest gift from the decade that is ending tonight, and in the next decade I get to be the one that stands beside them or behind them or in front of them depending on what they need me to do, for that I am the luckiest person in the world, there is nothing else that I could need or want other than them!

I do hope that things get better and we have less worries this year. I pray for health for our parents, sibling, friends and relatives, 2009 was a rough year for much of my family and I am praying that God will shed some relief upon them.

The past year had many ups and downs, but that is part of life, there is nothing I wish did not happen or that I really want to change, because without those experiences I would not be where I am today, and I am happy and content with where I am today!!

I wish everyone and their family and friends a blessed 2010! Health is all we need and to keep our loved ones close to us!

3 Years

2009-12-18T16:27:00.002-05:00

Time has passed by yet again. Three years ago I was starting on my devasation of experiencing a miscarriage, that week, the precious week before Christmas was horrible for me, but for my children, the ones I was able to hold in my arms and the one I had lost, I carried on and moved forward.

Three years. Time. Wonder. Sadness. Relief. I feel so much better today, 3 years later than I did last year at this time, or two years before than, it does get easier but you never forget, ever. Others might and that's okay, others might not appreciate this post but for me I cannot forget, ever.

I am sitting here in the living room watching Gabrielle play all by herself and I am filled with joy, she has completed me 100%, without the loss of my baby Gabrielle would not be who she is and for that I am thankful, beyond words.

Check Out Emma's New Smile!

2009-12-02T18:58:00.002-05:00

Emma lost her first tooth today. Sadly, the tooth is lost, but I'm sure the tooth fairy will still come, she's going to be disappointed though not to get a tooth in return.

I'm wondering what the tooth fairy will bring, someone told me $10, HA, I say, not happening here. Do you think I can get away with a quarter like I used to get?

And another milestone in parenting has been reached....

2009-11-30T18:43:00.002-05:00

Emma has her FIRST loose tooth. I feel as if my heart stopped when I discovered it, she is so excited but I feel so sad, she is growing so fast, I remember when she got that first tooth. It's so funny how she is so excited and I feel older with this new milestone.

Also, today, Kailee for the very first time, zippered her own jacket, 4 times!!

Can It Be A Year?

2009-11-22T12:54:00.003-05:00

I cannot believe with all my heart that one year ago I was in the hospital waiting to hold my baby girl in my arms. We didn't even know what we were going to name her! Time has flown by and I've tried with all my might to slow it down but have not had any luck.

Gabrielle Michelle has completely blown me away! She has filled all the missing pieces in my heart and has completed our family in a way that I could never have imagined. She is just incredible. I have without a doubt loved every single minute of her first year. I have taken time out to enjoy the good, the bad, the ugly, the smelly and the scary!

birth

thanksgiving

first pro pic

1 month/1st xmas

2 months

3 months

christening

4 months

5 months

easter

6 months

7 months

8 months/1st 4th of July

9 months

10 months

11 months/1st Halloween

Professional First Birthday Pictures

7 more days

2009-11-15T11:59:00.002-05:00

Gabby is 51 weeks old! I cannot believe it that one week from today we will be celebrating her 1st birthday. I am seriously in denial. Last year at this time I was so very pregnant and so very content and in no hurry for her to be born, I loved being pregnant with her and enjoyed every single moment of it. Now, one year later, I feel the same way, I am in no hurry for her first year to be over. I wish I could turn the clock back and have her teeny tiny little body in my arms again.

She is becoming and incredible little girl, fantastic daughter and incredible sister. I watch how she interacts with everyone so differently and happy she is 99.9%of the time. I hope that never, ever changes. She is funny, and intelligent, curious and content. She loves to play peek-a-boo, and color with the girls, she loves to snuggle and be chased around.

Yesterday she even fed herself spaghetti with zucchini on a fork all by herself. We put the food on the fork and she took it and put it in her mouth and then gave it back for more food.

She is cruising around, she is pushing things while she tries to walk but doesn't have the balance yet to walk alone, and that is fine by me!!! She gives kisses, and dances and comes when you call her, and says "what's that", and "hi" all the time. She is FOREVER smiling!!

This past year has been quite a ride, but she fit in perfectly and once she was here for a few months, I knew without a doubt in my heart that she was what was missing from my life, I am so happy, content and blessed beyond my wildest dreams or imagination to have been chosen to be the mother of 3 incredible girls!!

Gabby's LAST FIRST Holiday

2009-10-31T19:20:00.004-04:00

WOW. I really cannot believe that today is Halloween and Gabby's last first holiday, it's so sad. I really cannot grasp where this year went. It flew by, it's so hard to imagine and remember that I was still pregnant last year at this time. Sometimes I really miss it, and I really, really miss the newborn days but I know that my days of having a newborn in my house are behind me, and in only 22 days I will have a 1 year old, I can't believe it!!!

Here are some pictures from today:

Flying by Fall

2009-10-15T15:30:00.002-04:00

Time is F-L-Y-I-N-G!!! I cannot believe that we are half way through October already, and how much things have changed. We are pretty much in a good routine with school, but I am still struggling a bit with the rest of my to do list and the time schedule that I have around pick up/drop off.

I have joined the PTA and have been chosen to be class Mom for Kai's class. I'm glad about it, but not sure what it entails. I have so much on my mind where Kailee is concerned, it's been a bit of a struggle with her lately. She doesn't cooperate with speaking when spoken to and is not participating in eye contact during conversations, she is even running away and pretending not to hear me when I call or her, or blatantly not listening and looking me right in the eye and disobeying me. I don't know what is going on with her and I am not sure how to proceed either.

I have not had much time for blogging, and I really miss writing as well as reading and commenting on all of the blogs that I have been following for so long, I am hoping to catch up and get back to participating.

We are in full swing of planning Gabby's 1st birthday party. Can you believe I just wrote that? Her first birthday, I am so sad about it, I don't want her to turn one, I have loved this past year with her so much, and I do love watching her grow and change and develop and interact, but let me tell you how much I wish I could have her newborn days back. She has brought so much to my life and to our family that I have trouble finding the words to describe how I feel.

Gabby has quite a reputation at school! She is known as smiley! EVERYONE knows who I am because of her, the assistant principal goes out of her way to see Gabby every time we are at school, and Gabby is always a willing participant to offer a huge grin. It is impossible for me to not smile when she flashes her grin!

We are all looking forward to Halloween, the girls have their costumes ready and are looking forward to the Boogie Bash and the parade at school. We will be trick-or-treating with our friends that live right near us and go to school with Kailee. We had a great play date last week, and I am really thrilled to have met someone who I get along with, and have tons in common with, it really makes this mothering much easier to have friends to talk to and lean on!

I really will try to blog more often!

It's been a while...

2009-10-05T08:08:00.003-04:00

I have been a bad blogger of late! There is so much going on and not enough time to get it all done. I know I am not alone in feeling this way. The girls are in full swing at school, and although I am not used to the schedule, the demands, the running around, and the exhausting, they are doing great, which is all that matters.

We've also had our first bout of sickness! Emma missed school last Tuesday, and today, Kailee is home, sadly, Emma is home also because Kai feel too awful to go out and bring her to school, Gabby is sick too. What a bummer let me tell you!

We went to Brooklyn on Friday to see Michelle, the kids & Papa, it was great to see them all but too fast of a visit. Munya came home with us and spent the weekend for my birthday.

I had a GREAT birthday! It's been a really long time since I could say that. Lou did a great job with the presents, and Munya helped out and made it all perfect. The girls had a great time, and the best part is that we didn't go crazy and spend the days out all day we enjoyed time at home and just relaxed a bit.

I hope the girls are better soon, I hate when they are sick, although, I really don't mind them staying home today!! I'm a bad mom!

2009-09-22T16:24:00.001-04:00

Can it be 10 months already?

2009-09-22T16:21:00.002-04:00

I really cannot believe that my baby is 10 months old today. I remember when Emma was this age and I couldn't wait for her 1st birthday, even with Kailee I was so excited. This time around it's the complete opposite, I really just want her to be tiny again, time has gone so fast and I wish I could stop it!

Check out the above post (thanks to technical difficulties, yet again) for some month by month pictures of my little Gabby Goo!

Kids Videos

2009-09-15T19:11:00.006-04:00

Gabby loves the camera!

When I looked over at Gabby playing with her house, she was on top of the green step, of course, she got down as soon as I turned the camera on, but either way I love watching her play by herself.

Just like her sisters before her, Gabby LOVES being swung by Lou, me on the other hand prefers not to watch, but when I hear that laugh, it makes me smile!

Here are two videos from Emma, she talks about her school day and what she does, and sadly she describes a "LOCK DOWN DRILL" which they practiced on 9.11 this past Friday. It KILL me that this is the things that her days are filled with, and she also informed me after the camera was away, that they spend a lot of time learning about GERMS, washing their hands, and how to sneeze and cough properly. They are instructed to get up and wash their hands each and every time they sneeze or cough, in kindergarten they are able to do this, as their is a sink direclty in their class. Thanks to the SWINE FLU outbreak last Spring, they have to add this to the lesson plans and it makes me angry!

And last but not least, Kailee talks about her day..........

Everything looks better upside down!

2009-09-14T09:03:00.004-04:00

Gabby is obsessed with being upside down! She will throw herself backwards and if you are holding and not prepared, look out! She can also push off of my chest and flip herself completely over! She will grunt until Lou turns around and looks at her, she loves to be upside down! Here are some pictures we were finally able to get of her enjoying her new position!

and finally stealing some juice:

Gabby loves looking out the door:

School Pictures Finally!!

2009-09-13T19:38:00.011-04:00

Getting ready to leave for school!

Showing her Strawberry Shortcake backpack!

My babies!

My beautifully purply coordinated girl with her Tinkerbell backpack.

In front of school.

Emma coming out at the end of the day

Kai waiting to go in

Kai on line

Emma on line waiting to go in

Emma coming home!

Emma going in

Kailee going in

Kailee coming out on Thursday

Kailee on line waiting to be picked up

It's Friday!!!

2009-09-11T15:17:00.003-04:00

Well the first week of school is behind me! Whew! What a week. I cried again this morning. That's three in a row for me. It's going to take me a while to get used to this, I'm exhausted and overwhelmed and it shows all around me. The in and out 3 times a day is incredibly exhausting.

Yesterday Lou went to work with his dad so I had the car, it's such a short ride so it's great. I brought Emma to her line and stayed for a bit then had to leave to bring Kailee, this part breaks my heart. Luckily I was able to watch Kailee go inside and get back to Emma before she went inside that made me feel a little better, but really leaving them feels awful. They have been my every day for the past 5 years to walk away and leave them with strangers is such a crappy feeling.

Today was INSANE. We were up and out of the house at 6:00 to bring Lou to SI so that we could have the car because the weather is HORRIFIC!!! I brought them to school and it was indoor line up and was told that there was no way for me to get to the cafeteria with the stroller. Luckily the crossing guard was there to give me information and helped me out. It was not the best feeling to have to make these quick decisions but I don't have a choice it's me and the three of them, and I have to put their best interest first and the worst is when I have to choose one child over another.

Picking Kai up I was better prepared but the weather was awful, and we were soaked. I was luckier picking Emma up, my father in law was home and watched Kailee & Gabby for me so I only had to get Emma and run back home, what a life saver that was cause it's still pouring.

Now we are home and exhausted, Emma and Kailee are fighting, Emma is crying, Gabby is crying, Kailee is hiding. It's a perfect day now.

I still have tons of pictures of the girls but my camera is STILL in the car, I promise tomorrow to upload pictures. I really need to figure out a routine and schedule that is more comfortable right now I feel like a fish out of water.

9/9/09 - What A Day for the First Day of School!

2009-09-09T21:09:00.002-04:00

This date can't be forgotten! It's so easy to always remember the girls first day of school. The girls were up really early and were so excited! It was fun. Lou went in late so we drove. A lot of the streets are closed because everyone walks to school! There are crossing guards everywhere and even police cars.

It was a difficult morning for me! I'd rather it that way anyway. The girls line up outside in two seperate areas, very far away from one another, it was crappy that I had to choose who I stood with, so Lou stayed with Emma and I went with Kailee. I felt really bad but I thought that since Kailee had never gone to school it was more important for me to be with her, Emma was sad but she was okay. Kai was nervous and my stomach was in knots!

Luckily Kailee went into the building and I was able to run across the school yard to see Emma walk into her classroom. I don't know how I am going to do it tomorrow by myself, I hate to think of Emma all alone but I know in a few short days that she will be telling me it's okay to leave.

Kailee only had school for an hour today, she came out with a smile on her face and some paper work in her back pack, nothing exciting just some papers for me to fill out. She said she played in the kitchen and got to wear bride dress up shoes. I am wondering if there was more but she isn't sharing right now, hopefully she will tell Emma or Munya or Papa later. We'll see.

Well I'm glad to say that it's almost 2:00! In 40 minutes all my babies will be back in my arms! I can't wait to see Emma!! Emma had a good day, she enjoyed meeting the new students and having lunch in the cafeteria and then playing outside. I don't get much information as to what they did that day, so I will leave it alone and keep my ears open for when they talk to each other or to others in general.

Tomorrow we get to do it again! Pictures to come, camera is still in the car.

Twas the night before school...

2009-09-08T17:47:00.004-04:00

And all through the day there are butterflies in my stomach! WOW! Bad side of having children so close in age is when it falls on an occasion that both of them have a first on the same day. Tomorrow is the first day of Kindergarten for Emma and the first day of Pre-K for Kailee.

WOW! I am so anxious. I have been crying (alone in the bathroom, not in front of the girls) off and on all day, I just can't wrap my brain around the fact that I have to bring my babies and leave them at school tomorrow. It's all so strange to me. I know that we all will be fine, but until I get used to it and actually see them and hear their reactions I am overly anxious.

I am more worried about Emma being away from me all day than Kailee going for 2.5 hours, although I have my concerns about Kailee also, of course.

In the mean time clothes are picked and laid out, baths are done, next is dinner, a story and a movie to follow with hopefully an early bed time. The girls need to be in school at 8:30, so we have to leave here around 7:50ish. Oh, and I have to make LUNCH for Emma, seriously?

Well we'll just have to see how it goes. I will post again tomorrow all the news with pictures and video of course!

Uploading Video Experiment

2009-09-08T10:37:00.000-04:00

I have been trying forever to upload videos (multiple) in the same post and just have no luck, so here I go trying again. Well so far so good! Here are a couple of Gabby videos!

In the first one she is talking and walking along the couch.

This one is of her playing with her play house.

And this is drinking Emma's juice!

Random

2009-09-07T09:52:00.004-04:00

Well it's Labor Day, wow. I can't believe the summer is coming to an end. I have mixed emotions. Summer is not what it used to be, when I was single or even just married with no children. It's become a bit more complicated, but I'm sure as time goes by it will get easier as the kids get older, this year was a bit hard between moving and Gabby being an infant.

Well needless to say time marches on and with that comes a new season. I really love the change of the seasons. It brings with it new hope, new color, new flavor (I LOVE Fall Food), and new beginnings, a perfect clean slate, so to speak.

Gabby has been "talking" up a storm, and cruising all over the place she can crawl faster than I can catch her and is walking holding on to furniture. She has attempted letting go and can lean against things as well as hold her balance for about 2 seconds before she falls down. She will walk if Emma (only) holds her hands, and the three girls play ring a round the rosey together. She loves being with her sisters and has started to get angry if she can't get to them, usually when her and I are downstairs and they are up in their room (like right now) she is at the bottom of the steps trying to call them.

Yesterday I helped the girls clean their room, it was awful you couldn't even walk into it! There were taoys everywhere. While I was doing that, Gabby was having a great time playing in their room, and in the mean time she found herself in the mirror, it was so funny, she was kissing herself and waving and babbling!!

She loves playing in there and on a couple of occasions yesterday she was the one taking the toys out, and the girl got mad cause they had to clean up after her! I told them that's how I feel when I have to clean their room for them. I also was able to organize their closet so they each have their own side and get an idea of what they are going to wear to school this week.

I can't believe I am going to have 2.5 hours alone with only Gabby! It's going to be odd. I hope it's fun and that I can enjoy it but yet be productive. The harder part is going to be when Kai is home before Emma gets out of school, Kailee isn't sure how to exsist without Emma, it's going to be good for and give her the opportunity to become more independent and even build her relationship with Gabrielle.

The past is still present

2009-09-06T18:54:00.004-04:00

Sometimes it's so hard for me to see the past when I look at the girls, I just see today and maybe every now and then I get a glimpse of the future, but last night, I was lying in bed nursing Gabby, and Emma was lying next to me, drinking juice, holding my hand and watching The Sound of Music (which sparks memories of my childhood no matter how many times I watch it).

Anyway, for more than a few minutes, I was looking up at Emma and I saw the baby she used to be, her innocence, her vulnerability, her ability to be a child in awe of a great movie and holding on to her Mom's hand. It was an incredible moment for me, and it made me think of a specific picture of her, that I have located yet, but see if you can see the little girl in the big girl or or the big girl in the little one and let me know what you think!

10 days until school

2009-08-31T10:01:00.002-04:00

Seriously? I cannot believe it, 10 more days and both girls will be in school. We are still waiting on the letters to come in the mail with all the info but we were able to get some details on line and we were also able to meet both girls teachers and see their classrooms last Monday when I went for a meeting regarding Kailee's therapy.

Kai will have to be re-evaluated but they do not foresee any issues with her therapy continuing. Although I see an incredible improvement I still see problems. I hope she will continue to get better, but I know that by being in school every day and receivin therapy on top of that she will be just fine. I'm a little worried about her in general, about her listening and following instructions, and paying attention and not acting out. She will be going in the morning and her teacher's name is Mrs. Stone.

Emma is going to be going full day! I still cannot wrap my head around that fact. 8:30-2:30!! Lunch out. That is going to be a huge problem for my picky horrible eater, but I guess we will deal with it one day at a time. Her teacher's name is Mrs. Palisay and I fell in love with her on the spot. Her classroom is huge and has lots of neat stuff, she's going to have library, computers, spanish and art.

I am a little worried about her also of course but not as much as I am about Kailee, I know deep down inside that they will be fine. I will be able to go out now and meet other mom's and children in the neighborhood so that will be great for me also, I am looking forward to the routine and comfort that going to school brings by filling up the days and making sure I am up and out and about.

Happy 4th Birthday Kailee!

2009-08-22T21:53:00.000-04:00

I can't believe you are 4! Four entire years since you came into my life and I held you in my arms. You sweet girl are amazing. You are funny and generous kind and loving. There is no one who gives a better hug. I miss our cuddle time since Gabby came into our lives but you have adjusted wonderfully and have become so independent. I am blessed to have you for a daughter and love you more than you can ever know!

Here are some pictures from our party at Aunt Meshell's and Dutch Wonderland birthday adventure:

2009-08-21T08:49:00.001-04:00

Story Telling

2009-08-16T11:40:00.005-04:00

Where do you draw the line in telling "stories" to your kids. When do they actually catch on that you are "lying" or in other words "full of crap"?

It's getting harder and harder for me to pull one over on the girls, and I know that for the most part they believe every single thing I tell them. They believe that we can go to the store, and use Lou's phone to scan the bar code of a toy that they wanted added to their wish list, they believe that we have Santa on speed dial and direct email contact. They believe that when I buy something right in front of their face that it's not for them. But all of a sudden I'm starting to see the doubt on Emma's face.

I knew the days were going to be numbered, but the tough part really is timing. I don't have a lot of time in which I am able to shop, wrap and hide, it's really impossible. Last week we went to toys r us for Kai's birthday gift ideas. We walked around the store and she picked things out that she liked, and we "scanned" them. But then, all of a sudden, she found the gift. Now we knew what we were going to get her. One problem solved. Lou and I were understanding each other, and it was now my turn to take the girls to the other side of the store so that he could buy the gifts, put them in the car and come back in and get us.

Right away, Emma wanted to know where Dad was going, that was easy, he was going to the bathroom. Okay, one hurdle crossed. Now we are done and go to the car, bag is in the trunk. Get kids in the car, head home and get in the house. Here's where things went wrong. Lou LEAVES THE BAG IN THE CAR.

Not really a big deal, we are not in the car at during the week. Yesterday, we are getting ready to get in the car and I remember the bag is in the middle of the car, I start wildly pointing at a "bird" for the girls to look at and usher them around the opposite side of the car. Lou puts the bag back in the trunk. I go to the trunk and strategically place things around the bag so that it can't be seen without x-ray vision.

We come home from shopping and Kai, me and Gabby stay in the car while Lou & Emma empty the groceries to put the cold stuff in the house. Guess who sees the bag?!?!? Emma - this is the worst case scenario. Why? You must be thinking that the presents are for Kailee so wouldn't the worst case be that Kai see's them? Nope. Emma who is at the edge of knowing fact from fiction, mom's story from BS has now seen the bag. I hear Lou tell her to be quiet. My heart sinks, I know it's over, and our children are very, very hard to make excited and actually surprise and get a reaction out of, especially Emma, Kai not so much, her innocence is still there, and she is happy with the smallest thing, she does not throw tantrums, she is the easy going one, but I wanted her to have that reaction, the reaction that every present giver always wants, but now Emma knows......

This morning Kailee tells me that she also has seen it but is scared to say where she has seen it, so she covers and says "you know, Mama, in the store, where I was sad when we didn't buy it". Emma is now smirking, I am choking on the tears and anger, and Lou is laughing. SO. NOT. FUNNY. Anyway, I think we are okay, cause she is still swearing it's in the store. They go to their room, where I hear Emma tell her about the bag in the car and I hear Kai say I thought I saw the bag.

DEVASTED, I am. Need to think on my feet. I say nothing. I am really angry because Lou told me that there was no opportunity for the bag to come out of the car. Really? How about every night this week when you went out to the car, to get coffee or put the garbage out and the kids were upstairs in bed? We have a hall closet that no one ever goes in. Perfect place. My fault I should have taken responsibility.

So I wait. About 1/2 hour passes and I call Kai into the bathroom. We chat about things. Then I ask her what she thinks she saw and where she thinks she saw it. She's still swearing it was pink and it looked like the one she wanted but it was different and it was in the store, she is a smart one, she is putting the stories together to make a new one, but I see the glimmer and the smirk, but deep down inside I see her just wanted to make everyone else happy. She did admit that Emma told her, but then I told her that it wasn't what she or Emma thought it was, it was a pink bag of mine and an empty shoe box in the bag. My girl hugs and kisses me, and says ok.

She then says, "we will wait until my birthday and see if the birthday present fairy brings it, and to please email her to tell her we won't be home and to bring her present to Dutch Wonderland." End of story as far as Kai was concerened.

I tried the same tactic with Emma, she said, "I am saw the bag". I said, "we have to keep secrets to make surpries, it wouldn't be fair to ruin it, and I don't think you would like it either". She said, "ok". I know she knows, that I know she knows, but she may not know that I know that she knows that I know. LOL!

Gimme back my juice

2009-08-14T17:22:00.001-04:00

I've been terrible at blogging lately, but this hould make you all laugh.

KLUCK - U - Both & My 100th Post!

2009-07-27T20:06:00.003-04:00

Well, today was spent going back and forth to Staten Island for Kai to go to school, getting more boxes from the house and running errands.

By the time we got back to NJ everyone was hungry so we used the navigator (appropriately named Georgia) to find a place to eat. I typed in food and a list of restaurants popped up.

KLUCK - U - Chicken was one of the names. I told Lou, he promptly told me, KLUCK - U. I repeated it back to him. While cracking up laughing we said it a few times to each other. After about 5 minutes, from the back, Emma yells - KLUCK U BOTH! Lou and were laughing so hard and she started cracking up. It felt so good, I don't remember how long it was when I laughed that hard. Out of the mouths of babes was never truer!

Internet is still not working properly so pictures and more posts will come shortly, I promise!

Technically it's really not my 100th post, thanks to blogger and my computer not getting along when it comes to adding pictures, slide shows and videos, but the log says "100" so I must pay tribute to that, considering I started in November that's pretty cool!!

"MOVING" Forward

2009-07-27T15:01:00.000-04:00

Well it's moving time! It's been a long week of packing and preparing but we made it! I am so glad to finally be here. The first night was insane. We didn't get to bed until midnight, and by then we couldn't find some much needed items (TV for girls room), and we were all too exhausted to care. I put sheets on our bed, and put the girls in our room on the floor on their little sleep out couches and we spent the first night at our new address together in one larger (thank GOD)bedroom. It was perfect.

Everyone slept great. I was so happy and content that even Lou noticed (and Lou does not notice much - LOL), he even said to me the next day, you seem happier than you have been in a really long time, and I am!

Sunday was spent emptying boxes while Lou was at work, and even with one arm (because Gabby REFUSED) to be put down on the floor got several boxes emptied. I was so proud of myself. Don't get me wrong there are still more to be emptied, but considering we are only here 1 day it's pretty good.

I have high hopes and expectations for this week since Lou is on vacation! Much more postings to come and plenty of pictures (as soon as the wire is located and the darn internet is working properly).

Kailee Swimming

2009-07-20T21:10:00.001-04:00

This was a great week! Lots going on and lots more to do. We had a fantastic playdate at Jaclyn's house and our first experience with a larger pool. The girls did great with swimmies and swim vests. Kai had another chance to strut her stuff at Denise & Tony's. She put her vest on and let go of me doing the doggie paddle! By the end of the pool season I'd say she's going to be pretty quick!!

Bad Blogger

2009-07-17T08:35:00.002-04:00

UGH! I've been terrible at blogging! It's been a while since I've posted and there have been lots of new things going on, but basically I just don't have the time to sit and type, and it's very rare that I have both of my hands available at any given time to to type.

Some quick little updates: Gabby has 4 more teeth, all on the top, all found at the same time, although we are still waiting for 2 of them to actually come out a bit more.

Yesterday we had a wonderful playdate and Gabby had her first experience of being in a pool and I am so glad to say she loved it. The girls did wonderful also, I thought they were going to be afraid of it being a 4 foot pool but they had a ball, Kailee had on swimmies and was letting go, and Emma felt perfectly safe enough to "swim" with her swim jacket on. It was a great afternoon.

We are moving in 6 days so of course that is where most of my time is going. PACKING!! I really can't stand it, and I'm looking forward to that part being behind us, I'm looking forward to the unpacking, but I am not looking forward to the "where should I put this" dilema. It took me a long time to get this house the way I wanted it and I am hoping that this is not the case again, but I'm sure it's going to be. There really isn't a deadline to have it all done, I'm not trying to be superwoman, nor am I trying to impress anyone, I want to do it right the first time, and my biggest goal is get rid of more stuff when I unpack, we just have way too much stuff.

My main goal is to make sure Emma & Kailee are the most comfortable and that their room is as homey as possible from the start, so that being said, when we move in on Saturday the first thing I will be working on is their room. We move on Saturday and then Lou works on Sunday so it's going to be a little difficult but I will make the best of it, and am determined to get it done, even though I know it may take a day or two.

We christened the twins last Sunday and had a great time! I love watching my girls enjoy themselves and interact with their family. It makes me so incredibly happy to watch them play with Nick and talk to Denise & Tony and snuggle up to Aunt Mary & Uncle Ralph, and joke around with Christina & Louie & Cousin Sister, and follow Alexandra, Lou Lou & Adrianna all around, they look up to them and it reminds me of when Michelle & I were younger. It's all so amazing and still after all these years of being a mom, it ovewhelms me at how they enjoy the simplest things. I wish I could remember that all the time.

Well it's time to feed my crew and start the packing for the day. The girls and I are head to NJ to clean and organize the boxes that are there already, the girls are going to be so excited when they find out that the TV is working in their new room today!

Lots of pictures to come in the next week or so!

SO BUSY

2009-07-06T17:44:00.001-04:00

We need to slow down! The past few days have been so busy and I am feeling the effects. I just don't have the stamina to keep up the busy pace so many days in a row anymore. School has only been out for three weeks and I already miss the simple pace of the everyday routine.

The past few days have been so busy and it's going to stay that way right through till the beginning of August once the move is over. I truly cannot wait.

We enjoyed a BBQ on the fourth of July and truly had a great weekend. Today is just a blah day. We have the twinkies Christening on Sunday and I can't wait!

Emma has been really giving me a hard time, pressing her luck, pushing my buttons and her limits. I'm looking forward to this phase being over, and think that she needs some time away from us because she is really used to having time to herself when she goes to school. She also likes to be outside and I really don't, aside from that Gabby is not at the best age to go and sit by the pool, she doesn't like to sit still and really shouldn't be exposed to the sun at this age. She's old enough for sun screen but her skin is so sensitive I'm afraid to put it on her, so it's just easier at the moment to avoid having her in the sun. We are also waiting for some blood test results for her as the dr is concerned that she hasn't gained a lot of wait, only 5 pounds since birth, but she is hitting all of her milestones way ahead of time and her weight is on par with the same as Emma & Kailee.

Today Gabby learned how to get down from standing, that really will make things easier, she also has turned around when she was called today, that's another good one cause calling her and her just going about her merry way was frustrating, today she stopped and came when called. She is also screaming and then laughs, waves goodbye, and knows that if she pulls Emma's hair she will turn around and make her laugh. I think she's getting ready to start clapping hands also.

Well she is screaming her head off right now for me to pick me up, and it's time to figure out dinner. Thank goodness bed time will follow.

2009-06-26T09:44:00.001-04:00

5 years of being a Mommy - Makes My Monday

2009-06-22T21:03:00.006-04:00

5 years ago I became a mother. My life was changed forever. It ha been filled with a lot of surprise both good and bad, unbelievable and surprising. I would never change any of it!

So of course again I cannot upload a video directly, nor can I post a link that actually works from photobucket, please view the slideshow from the above post!

Full Circle

2009-06-20T12:39:00.004-04:00

Emma completed her first year of school! Time flies, and no matter what you do to hold on to it, it's impossible, it's like trying to catch air.
I never thought I'd be ready for her to go to school, and I never thought she was ready to go to school, I couldn't imagine her being ready to spend 2.5 hours a day away from me, depending on herself and others to satisfy her needs and wants. Lo and behold she did it and she did it perfectly. Out of 184 days of school, she was only absent 3 times. That included Gabby being born, she did not miss school until she got sick in May. We were very lucky and blessed.

She walked into those doors at school in September and never looked back. She didn't like the weekends because she couldn't go to school. The projects she made, the books she read, the letters she learned to write are countless. Her drawings and handwriting have changed incredibly. She knows several of the 50 states, she knows who our President is, she knows who George Washington is, she can spell several words and can read her letters and numbers. She even knows what vowels are!

I am so lucky to have made friends also. I have grown as she has grown. I learned to accept and ask for help. I was blessed with making friends with three wonderful other moms whom have become such important women to me.

First Day of School

Last Day of School

Pre-School Graduation!

2009-06-19T11:11:00.006-04:00

Emma graduated yesterday. I can't believe it. The ceremony was wonderful, the weather was terrible. I am so proud of her. She looked beautiful and her participation in the ceremony was fantastic!

She announced the Pledge of Allegiance. The songs were great, and her diploma is adorable. Her report card was given out also and the two areas that were noted as needing improvement (buttoning snaps and walking up and down the steps alternating feet) were marked as improved!

Pictures:

It's my fake birthday - Emma

2009-06-16T10:46:00.000-04:00

Emma celebrated her "fake" birthday at school and at dance yesterday. It was tough trying to explain to her that her real birthday is not for another week, and after a while she started calling it her fake birthday. It was pretty cute. We made cupcakes for her classmates and handed out party bags. She had a great time.

Some pictures:

Dance Recital Day

2009-06-15T10:34:00.004-04:00

Yesterday's recital was great! Emma and Kailee danced fantastic! I was so proud. Looking back from Emma's first recital in 2007 the improvement and confidence was incredible! We had a great time.

2009-06-11T19:44:00.001-04:00

2009-06-11T19:43:00.001-04:00

Recital Rehearsal

2009-06-11T18:56:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was Emma & Kailee's Recital Rehearsal and they did wonderfully! Enjoy the videos in the above posts because of course I can't add them here directly again.

I'm Super Mom?

2009-06-09T19:31:00.002-04:00

Last week was a busy one! This one is starting out even crazier than last, and there is no more space on my calendar for next week....

Needlesss to say I had my OB appointment last Thursday and I love my doctor so much and after all these years and such a great relationship I consider her a friend. We had a very good conversation during my exam and through the years she has shared bits of her life with me. This time she was telling me about how she is the one who goes to work and her husband is a stay at home Dad. She was telling me how "afraid" she was that the next day she would be home "alone" with all three boys and had to do the entire routine for the day without her husband! I was floored. She told me she'd rather work a 90 hour week than have to stay home, it's just not for her, but the time that she does spend with them is incredible. She said after her second son was born she stayed home for all of three weeks and then it was decided that she was not cut out to be home. She said she couldn't do what I do. I look up to HER!! She looks up to me??? WOW!

Friday the girls had their well visits, it was the first time all three of them were getting examined for hte first time not being sick. I knew I was in for it. Needlesss to say Dr. walks in and calls me Super Mom! I said what are you talking about, you have three boys, she replied, "And, I NEVER go anywhere with them alone!"

I could not believe that in 24 hours two doctors, two incredible women in my eyes thought that I was incredible. I am still in shock. I see myself as exhausted, out of control and unorganized. It's incredible to look at yourself through someone else's eyes and be respected by such amazing women!!

Lots of Nothing?

2009-06-03T10:03:00.009-04:00

Well things are going but nothing major to report. The house is for sale and we've had several people in and out to see it. One offer but nothing to talk about. Gabby is moving and grooving. She is never in the same place twice, it's funny but frustrating, the girls are seeing her in a whole new light.

Since she has learned to stand she is also slightly moving while holding onto the couch, she will use ANYTHING she can to stand up with, bad part, it results in crying because she can't figure out how to sit down once she stands.

Emma went on her first school trip to Blue Heron Park, sadly the weather didn't cooperate so we just looked around and listened and learned about outdoor rules and birds.
Emma is practicing for graduation! I can't believe she is graduating from Pre-K. It has been an incredible year and the things she has learned is so incredible. It is so hard to believe that my baby is going to be 5 in two weeks.

We had our well visits this week and the dr. projects Emma & Kailee will be around 5'2'' when they stop growing. Gabby gained 5 ounces this month so we are working a few options to help her gain some weight. All had to get shots, it was not fun at all for anyone, but I have to say Kailee was a trooper!

We are in the process of packing, bringing boxes to the new location, and showing our house. I really hate showing our house it's so intrusive, and the strangers in and out of the house really drives me insane. The house is neat and we are doing our best to keep it that way. We hope to be living in NJ officially by the last week of July. We are praying that a realistic offer will come in and the bank will accept it, otherwise we will have to go a different route. Hard lessons have been learned and we will be paying for those lessons for a long time to come.

We have tons of things coming up this month. The girls recital is next weekend. I'm excited and releived at the same time. I am glad that it is over and I hope and pray that they are in the mood to dance on stage. I'm not that worried about Kailee but I have my doubts about Emma. We'll see!

Now for some pictures:

What happens if you take too long to buckle her:
Proud of herself:

Too cute for words:

Three of the same outfit is not an easy feat:

My blessings:

Cousins:

Gabby comforts Kai while she was on a time out:

Using my leg to stand:

Gabby's 1st taste of bananas. 6/1/09:

Gabby sitting and playing unassisted 6/1/09:

=

First french fry: 5/30/09:

Gabby's First Time in a High Chair (restaurant) 5/28/09:

Emma with the Park Ranger:
Beautiful Kailee after a shower:

Meeting the cousins........

2009-05-31T09:55:00.003-04:00

On Friday, Emma & Kailee & Gabby got to meet and hold their new cousins!! Emma is such a natural, she knows when to rock and when to cuddle, when to ask for help and when to try and make them happy. She even took fantastic pictures!

It was so amazing for me to hold my sisters' babies! They are so tiny and amazing, not to mention how much I absolutley LOVE newborns. They are so incredible. I still can't imagine how these two little beings were growing inside of her only 12 days ago!

TOO FAST

2009-05-29T08:18:00.001-04:00

Last night we were sitting on the couch and Gabby was crawling around on the floor. Within a few mintues she crawled herself on over to where I was sitting on the couch, put her hands up on the couch and was STANDING in front of me!!!! Lou was sitting here and the girls were also we all started screaming, we couldn't believe it.

Video/Pics to follow.....

Halfy Birthday Gabrielle

2009-05-22T16:19:00.002-04:00

Gabby is 6 months old today! Time goes way, way, way too fast. Look how much my baby has changed!

Thanksgiving Thursday

2009-05-21T08:06:00.002-04:00

I have avoided this post for a long time because as I do every so often I find it VERY hard to put into words to be thankful for, there has been a lot of stuff going on in my neck of the woods that isn't exactly terrible, but it's not wonderful either, there are things that need to be figured out and solutions need to be sort after. Emotional exhausting.

But, I have TWO very NEW things to be greatful for this morning.....

My niece and nephew entered this world yesterday afternoon, at 2:43, and 2:45 respectively, Joshua Joseph (6 pounds, 1 ounce), Riley Collette (6 pounds, 4 ounces).

It was so nice to be on the other side of the hospital for a change, my sister is feeling great and the babies are incredible. I can't wait to hold them!

To see more Thanksgiving Thursdays or to play along yourself, visit Nicole at What a Trip!

Announcing..........

2009-05-20T20:29:00.003-04:00

My beautiful baby sister, now has beautiful babies of her own! After waiting 6 long years and trying all things possible, I am finally blessed with being an AUNT!

Joshua Joseph was born today at 2:43 pm, weighing in at 6 pounds 1 ounce, followed by his beautiful sister Riley Collette (my goddaughter) at 2:46 pm, weighing in at 6 pounds 4 ounces!

WOOHOO!

Congratulations Cleary's we love you!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2023807&id=1405940974&l=6e2a05352a

Streak Ended

2009-05-19T15:59:00.002-04:00

I know that it's no big deal but to us it is. Emma missed her very first day of school today, and for me it was a terrible decision to make, although I know it was the right one. She had fever last night, and was really out of it, and although she woke up this morning with no fever and was acting pretty good I decided to keep her home.

She cried so badly and tried so hard to convince me otherwise. I explained to her that it was better for her to miss one day of school and get better instead of going to school today and then missing a lot of days. Her face broke my heart. She made it till May 19th, I'm so proud of her and myself (if it's okay to say that), we braved bad weather, Kailee being sick, a c-section, a newborn baby, and other numerous things that would have made it so much easier to just stay home, but together our determination came together and off to school she went each and every day, today, with one month left (Last day of class is June 19th), we stayed home.

SO BUMMED.

Guess What Gabby Got?

2009-05-11T18:39:00.004-04:00

A new tooth!!! I found it on Saturday. Bottom center right side! I am pretty sure that the one next to it is coming in also, and she is super cranky. She is eating oatmeal, peaches & pears, carrots she liked but they constipated her, one more day of peaches and then she'll have avacado, her first green food. She has also had pizza crust.

Thursday I got to go up to Emma's school and celebrate Mother's Day is was so cute, she stood up and said that she's loves me because I give her hugs and kisses, and she made me these:

On Sunday both girls woke up and remembered that it was Mother's Day and for the first time in a long time the first words I heard when I woke up was not I want juice! It was Happy Mother's Day, then they carried up my griddle pan with my cards on it, and made me a waffle with butter and syrup.

Time goes on

2009-05-03T13:48:00.000-04:00

Six years ago at this moment, I was standing in the back of the church waiting to walk down the aisle to get married. SIX YEARS. Time flies.

When we celebrated our first anniversary, I was 8.5 months pregnant with Emma, Emma who is now a month and a half away from turning 5! Time flies.

The same little girl that we were waiting for is now at a birthday party for one of her school mates at Chuck E. Cheese without me. She went in the car with Christine and Christian, I could not trust her safety anymore with them than if she were with me, but it was how she left, she told Emma & Kailee to be good for me while she was gone. She told me she will have a good time but listen to Christine, she told me she would be back before I knew it.

What can I say to that? Time flies.....

Way Back Whensday - Long Edition

2009-04-29T08:07:00.005-04:00

Okay, the title has warned you, this is a long one. This Way Back Whensday post actually happens to fall on week where a lot of things happened last year, and I've been reflecting on them personally so it's time to share because all the events led up to some major changes.

Week of 4/28/2008

I was 9 weeks pregnant and found out I need progesterone supplements right away, only one pharmacy makes them and it is on the other side of the island, through vigorous determination on my end of making phone calls and my husband's NASCAR driving capabilities, all was safely obtained, thank God.

The same time we are refinancing, out of desperation, our rate will reset in a matter of weeks, and we need to get this done now! Again, through sheer determination, and fighting massive all day (morning) sickness, we get it together and lower our payments by $400 per month!! WOO HOO.

All that being said, when we received out tax return we decided it was the PERFECT time to take the girls to Disney World, the ages were perfect, I was pregnant but feeling pretty good and we could at the moment pay for it, even though admittedly we should have paid off some credit cards, but we took once in a lifetime attitude and decided to go for it, and make it an extra long road trip/vacation.

On April 28, Lou calls me around 4:00 to tell me that after 10 years, yes I said 10 years, he was no longer employed. BAFFLED. He had given up so much the past 2 years for this company, he sacrificed our relationship for this company, his direct supervisor and I had had a conversation some weeks before and she said to me, "you like the house you live in?" "Then for that, your husband stays here". "In the end, it will be worth it", "He is great at this job, and we just need him to learn the rest of it." At this point in time he was working 15 hours a day, he was only home to sleep, I was suffering mentally, the kids were suffering from not having him around. I couldn't take it anymore, and the money wasn't even great, it was only great because he was working 7 days a week 15 hours a day and the OT was more than his regular salary.

We didn't know what we were going to do and we were scheduled to leave for Disney in 3 days. Guess what? We were still going and it was paid for, now we could take our time. Our new mortgage was funded at the same time. I was COUNTING the money in our pockets, we were going to be able to pay off all of our credit card bills and fix stuff up in the house, but with one phone call it was all gone, that money now had to go to surviving without a salary. They made him sign a paper that said he was quitting instead of being fired to protect their own a$$es, so now we were not entitled to unemployment and COBRA was $1400 per month which my father wound up paying for 3 months for us.

Now the $400 per month we were saving on our mortgage was no longer a savings with no income. Ahhh, the downward spiral continues.

Despite this we head out the door a day early and start driving to Florida, my dad joins us and splits all the gas costs with us, what a relief (even though this was all budgeted). We know that this will be the last vacation we have for a very long time of this magnatude, we will still be unemployed 10 days from now and are determined to enjoy ourselves and boy did we!

The trip was fantastic, we stopped in Virginia (stayed over night both ways), North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia (stayed over night both ways, on the way down for two nights). It was fantastic, I would drive it again and again. We had no DVD player in the car after the first 20 mintues of the ride, so if we can drive to and from Disney World without a DVD player we never need one in the car again. We had a flat tire on the way down, and lost our power steering on the way home. All of it was just bumps in the road of a wonderful vacation.

We celebrated our 5th Anniversary on May 3rd, can't believe this Sunday will be 6 years. BUMPY ROAD again, but we are surviving on our own.

We came home and dealt with reality. It took Lou a couple of months but he found a job, a wonderful one that he is good at and where they show him respect and do not make unnecessary demands on his personal time. It was hard and I had hoped so much for different things but this is the way things are and whose to say that it would have been better or worse if these bumps didn't happen?

For more Way Back Whensday posts or to create your own, please visit: Cheryl at Twinfatuation.

St. Jude Trike-A-Thon at Woodrow Preschool

2009-04-26T09:28:00.004-04:00

On Thursday, Emma participated in a Trike-A-Thon to raise money for St. Jude's Children's Hospital. It was so cute all the kids got on their bikes and rode around the Gym at school. Miss Lisa is the school's director and she informed us that Woodrow Pre-school has raised over $25,000 for St. Jude's over the past years, that will get the school announced on Noggin (cable TV Channel) during the summer months. I was so happy to hear that.

I remember many years ago participating in a "Type-A-Thon" for St. Jude's. It is an absolutely wonderful charity.

Anyway, I'm still having annoying issues with uploading videos to the blog directly so I have to post them through photobucket. Below are the two videos showing the kids at the Trike-A-Thon. Emma even answered one of Ms. Jeany's questions!!

2009-04-26T09:28:00.001-04:00

2009-04-26T09:27:00.001-04:00

A Message From Gabby....

2009-04-23T14:11:00.001-04:00

Below this post is a video of Gab using my computer!! She is really getting her hand eye coordination in gear, I need to keep everything out of her reach already!

2009-04-23T13:17:00.001-04:00

Way Back Whensday - Gabby

2009-04-22T08:04:00.004-04:00

Our newest peanut is 5 months old today, already. Time goes way to fast!!! She is crawling, playing, and trying to sit up. I thought that she would be the slowest but too my suprise it's just the opposite, so in honor of Way Back Whenesday here is my baby. It's not that way back but 5 months, is 5 months!

November 22, 2008

April 11, 2009

To read more Way Back Whensday's or to play along yourself visit Cheryl at Twinfatuation.

Back To The Routine

2009-04-20T09:59:00.002-04:00

Monday is here and it's back to the daily grind. I was not feeling it this morning when I had to drag myself out of bed to a rainy cold Monday, but once in gear it's not so bad.

Dropped Emma off at school, then came home, sorted laundry, through a load in the machine which should be done in time to go in the drier before I leave to pick Emma up from school, came upstairs started dinner, emptied and filled the dishwasher, cleaned one of the humidifiers, cleaned off half the table, emptied the garbage pail, put some papers away, and the list goes on!

Today's dancing school, I am so ready for it to be over, it's just another thing to do and get ready for and Monday is such a long day. Thank goodness only a few more weeks.

Emma has her trike-a-thon for St. Jude's Children Hospital on Thursday morning, that should be fun, but Kailee is going to have a hard time just watching, oh well, that's the way it goes.

Vacation was nice, we didn't get to do to much which wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Thursday we went to Brooklyn and hung out with Michelle, she's going to be 34 weeks tomorrow, so the end is in sight! We went to Babies R Us, and then stayed at her house for a while, wound up going to New Corner's with Grandpa, Uncle Tony, Aunt Theresa and the boys, got home pretty late.

Friday was nice went up to Nicole's in the afternoon and went to the park. It was beautiful out, and had another late night. Gabby was "sitting" on Aunt Colie's couch, we propped her up with her weight on her hands, and she stayed. Gabby fell asleep in the car and I was able to get her into the crib and she didn't get up until 3:45! I was up early in the morning and cleaned the upstairs bathroom while the girls were watching Madagascar and Gabby and Lou were sleeping. I love productive quiet mornings!

Saturday we went to Walmart and for an early dinner at Cheeseburger in Paradise, Gabby was "sitting" on the table by herself. Yesterday on the floor she was able to push herself so that she was "sittting" on her legs and leaning on her hands, this kid is just way to fast, I'm on a mission now to baby proof the second floor of the hosue, the kids can't have toys down here anymore and we are vacuuming all day long.

I have pictures to post also, and will hope to get to that later.

VIDEOS, videos & VIDEOS!

2009-04-14T13:00:00.000-04:00

I have been having a really hard time posting videos individually and being able to type as well in the same post, since then I've found a way around it, through photobucket to add the videos, but without the explainations, so this post will go through them from bottom to top.

The first one (at the bottom) is Gabby finding her tongue, it was pretty hysterical, she kept sticking it out and trying to make raspberries.

The second one she is successful in the raspberrying and finding her tongue some more.

The third one is of her first taste of cereal on April 7th. She really liked it, especially when it was thicker, she is also a messy eater, her hands, hair, clothes and high chair got some cereal also.

The last one (closest to this post) is of her crawling, she is getting quicker, the past couple of days she has learned to do push ups, with her ankles crossed! I need to get that one on video!

2009-04-14T12:54:00.001-04:00

2009-04-14T12:52:00.001-04:00

2009-04-14T12:50:00.001-04:00

2009-04-14T12:45:00.001-04:00

Thanksgiving Thursday

2009-04-09T16:12:00.002-04:00

It's Thanksgiving Thursday and I haven't participated in quite a while so here it goes for today!

Easter Vacation. I really needed a break from the every day getting up, getting out, running around routine. Not sure how I will feel about it by Monday but for tday I am thankful.
Emma made it through to Easter break without missing a day of school!!!
A beautiful day that wasn't wasted, we went to two parks, out to lunch with Papa, and the girls are still outside with him now.
My sister is holding her own, now 32 weeks pregnant with the twinkies.
Palm Sunday, was great spending time with my Aunt and Cousin, Mom and sister.
The bad dream I had last night, it was bad, scary bad, but I hope that feeling stays with me and reminds me how lucky I am and that I will not waste more days away doing nothing.
Kailee's OT, I've seen some improvements and now that I have some ways to work with her it really helps my outlook.
My girls. (Enough said)
My network of "online" friends, it's so good to have a place to go where you can say anything and not be judged, but be helped and supported.
My frustratingly always messy house, it means I have a house and stuff to make it a mess.

To read more (or post your own) Thanksgiving Thursday's please visit Nicole at: what a trip!

Way Back Whensday

2009-04-08T08:06:00.004-04:00

Emma's 1st Easter, March 2005, 9 months old

Emma's 5th Easter, April 2009, 4 years, 10 months

Kai's First Easter: April 2006 - 8 months Old
Kai's 4th Easter: April 2009 3 years, 8 months
If you'd like to participate in Way-Back Whenesday, visit Cheryl at Twinfatuation.

Trying To Keep Up

2009-04-06T18:25:00.008-04:00

Well time is flying! Easter is less than a week away, and I can't believe how fast the first 3 months of the year have gone by. On the same note, Gabby is almost 5 months old. How on earth can that be? Time has flown, I thought that I could keep her from growing up so fast, but boy was I mistaken.

On Friday she thought it would be a good time to get up on all fours and try to now crawl forward! What happened to being content with going backwards for a while? On Saturday she decided it would be a good time to raspberry! I can see the intent look on her face when she is trying to learn something new. She watched me do raspberries and slowly but surely she had it mastered, it's so cute (as long as food is not involved). She also spent a lot of time in her exersaucer on Saturday, it's so cute and she really likes it.

Sunday we were at Munya's for Palm Sunday. Aunt Mary, Uncle Ralph, Denise, Tony & the boys as well as Michelle & Chris were all there. Talk about time flying AJ will be 18, in July. Yup, 18. I can't even imagine, I was 19 when he was born. Where does the time really go? Next Palm Sunday Michelle's babies will be walking around. I wish I could slow it down.
Gabby tried some Italian bread yesterday and Pizza crust today. We go to the doctor tomorrow and I am pretty sure I will be able to start her on solids. I was hoping to delay it until she was 6 months old, but this girl wants to eat.

In the exersaucer:

Loving her inch worm:

Deep in conversation with inch worm:

Sleeping with Inch Worm:

Palm Sunday:

Nick & AJ with the girls:

Chilling on the couch with a back rub from Uncle Chris

Kailee & Uncle Ralph
She crawled backwards so fast she wound up under her mat!

Scooting Away

2009-04-02T20:24:00.006-04:00

The slower I want things to happen, the faster they do

2009-04-02T07:56:00.004-04:00

I cannot believe I am even posting this, and I will get a video as proof - LOL, but for the past three days Gabby has been practicing getting up on her knees and her hands, it took a few tries but last night and again this morning she actually crawled backwards!!

The past week or two she has army crawled across my bed and the floor or inch wormed her way to where she wants to go, I have to now put a blanket on the floor under her mat (I am so grossed out by her face on my rug, not that it's dirty, it's just a rug, and I hate it), but she is determined to move and I can't believe how fast it's happening! She has not really rolled from belly to back yet, but once she figures that out, I'm in trouble!! LOL!!

In the Crib?!?!?

2009-03-30T14:07:00.002-04:00

There is a first for everything!!!

Saturday night I decided to try and put Gabby in the crib. I nursed her at 9:30, she fell asleep in my bed, I picked her up and put her in the crib at 10:30, she fussed a few minutes and I rocked her a little bit, she fell asleep right away, I heard her fussing at 2:30, and again at 4:15, by the time she was really crying it was 5:15!!!I took her in my bed and fed her, I was in so much pain, after nursing all night long for the past 4 months, an 8 hour stretch was a bit much, but I was so happy, I still didn't sleep though, I made Lou switch sides with me cause the crib is on his side of the bed and I couldn't sleep.

Last night I did it again, I nursed her until about 10:30, and put her in the crib, she started to cry but I was in the bathroom, by the time I got out she was sound asleep! She cried out at 2:15 but by the time I got to the crib she was asleep again, she woke up for food at 4:45! Last night I slept much better, I know she is safe, I'm just worried that she work herself into a corner by the bumper, and she sleeps only on her belly, but since she rolls over by herself there really isnt' anything I can do, I put her down on her back and find her peacefully asleep on her belly sucking her little thumb!

Way Back Whensday

2009-03-18T18:07:00.007-04:00

That is my beautiful Emma, in her first visit to the park. She wasn't even a year old yet. I think she was 10 months old.

I registered her for KINDERGARTEN today, FULL DAY, LUNCH without MOMMY, Kindergarten. My heart is broken. I want to go back in time.

If you'd like to participate in Way-Back Whenesday, visit Cheryl.

Happy Green Patricks Day - Kailee Style

2009-03-17T19:07:00.003-04:00

Kailee wished us a Happy "Green" Patrick's Day today, we tried to tell her it was St. Patrick's Day, but she insisted and seriously who am I to argue?

Another Milestone

2009-03-16T09:41:00.003-04:00

Not sure if it's a fluke or not, possibly a balance issue, but Gabby rolled to her belly, than to her back, then to her belly, it was pretty funny, and she hasn't done it again since, so my guess is that she rolled so fast she flipped herself over, but just in case it was the first time, I needed to write it down!

Edited to Add: That it was a fluke, but it has happened again, on a few more occasions, she much more prefers her belly.

So Frustrated

2009-03-13T11:54:00.003-04:00

Well Emma's "acceptance" letter for kindergarten came in mail yesterday. First of all that statement is wrong on so many levels. How do you get accepted to a zoned public school? I don't understand that at all.

Second part that really pisses me off, you have to register again, this is the second time we have to go to the school to fill out paperwork and prove we are who we are and we live where we live, worst part? Emma has to come with me, so unnecessary in my opinion, even worse? Her registration time is Wednesday, March 18th, between 9:00-11:00 am. What's the problem with that? Emma goes to school already between 8:45 and 11:15.

My dilemma is, how do I do both? Why should she have to miss school (for the first time no less), go in late or leave early to register for school? What message does that send? She loves school, she loves to be on time, she loves to leave when school is over, and feels no reason to absent unless she is sick. This is something that must be within herself, because I have never "forced" these beliefs on her. I have on several occasions asked her if she wanted to stay home, and her response is always "no". Now, I have to explain to her that she has to miss school, to register for school? What message is that sending? Aside from the entire prospect of my little girl going to school for 6.5 hours a day isn't hard enough, I have this on my mind as I go to bed last night.

I kindly called the school this morning to ask about this, and smartly did not give my name. I don't want it written down already that I am a trouble maker or any other thing that will hinder her having a good experience in school. The woman was very cut and dried, there is nothing that can be done about it, she must report to registration with me on Wednesday between 9 and 11, meaning she must miss school, go in late or leave early. I have the wonderful job of picking the lesser evil. I continue my conversation and again ask the woman how this policy makes sense for someone to miss school, when attendance is stressed as a key to education (OK, not in preschool maybe, but if this is something that is important to my daughter, am I not sending her the wrong message?), the woman at school also informed me that I must be there "way before 11" because she needs to have the process done by 11 to be cleaned up and out of the lunch room for the first lunch period.

So, now, my dilemma continues, if I take the chance and get there for 9:00, what if the process takes so long there is no point in sending her to school for 15 minutes? The other hand is to bring her in at 8:45 and pick her up at 10:15 giving me 45 minutes to get there and complete the registration process? This just sucks! On top of that, I need to stop speaking out loud negatively in regard to school, because Emma has said on several occasions that she wants to stay in her school and not go to a new one. I did tell her that she will have to leave school early on Wednesday and she responded with "I know, to register for a new school, ugh".

Thanksgiving Thursday - By Emma & Kailee

2009-03-12T17:47:00.003-04:00

Just this morning, I was told by Emma, that she didn't have enough fingers. I asked her what she meant, and she said, "Mom, I don't have enough fingers, to count All The People I Love, you know there are a lot." Of course, then Kailee decided she should count to, and discovered that she had the same "problem".

How is that for Thanksgiving Thursday!!

Now for my list:

Super friends, old and new.
Another day, it's so good to know that I can get a "do over" tomorrow.
My OB who is now taking wonderful care of my sister and the twinkies, she is in good hands, and for that I am so thankful.
Having things to complain about, so people really have nothing.

For more Thanksgiving Thursday or to join in with your own post, visit Nicole over at What A Trip!

The first big milestone....

2009-03-06T18:50:00.005-05:00

She will be 15 weeks tomorrow, I have to double check, but I'm pretty sure this is the earliest any of my babies rolled from back to belly!

Just to note, she is sucking her thumb while rolling over! She's multi-tasking already :)

It's Just So Chicky

2009-03-06T07:44:00.002-05:00

Ahh, the language of a toddler, I L-O-V-E it!!! Yesterday, I was trying to get everyone buckled and ready in the car, and I said to Emma, I wish you'd learn how to buckle your seat belt, and she said, yeah, Mom, I'm working on it!

Then I scoot across the narrow back row on my knees to buckle Kailee who is having issues that she is still in a car seat with as she refers to it "the baby buckle", and I say to her, can you try to put your strap on? Can you buckle the top buckle? She then replies, "Mom, it's just to chicky". I say, "Chicky?". Emma then translates, "TRICKY, Mom, TRICKY".

I smile, smirk, try not to crack up, and HAPPILY buckle my girl's CHICKY car buckle!

Thanksgiving Thursday

2009-03-05T18:07:00.002-05:00

Ahh, it's Thanksgiving Thursday and sometimes it's really, really (and I mean really) hard to find something , anything to be thankful for, which is why I am so glad that I get to have the motivation of Nicole at What A Trip!, to keep me thinking. Please check out her blog for more Thanksgiving Thursday posts, or to create your own list!

So without further soul searching here is my list for this week.

Lou is better, and back to work!
Gabby is growing and healthy!
Emma still has perfect attendence, thanks to a rare snow day for the NYC Public School System!
My sister and the twinkies are doing well.
We get to see my family on Saturday to celebrate Michelle's birthday, we haven't seen any of them since the Christening, exactly a month ago!
Springing ahead this weekend, woohoo!
My two friends from pre-school, they make my hectic Tuesdays & Thursdays less frantic.
The ability and determination to do my best each day.
The fact that I can type with one hand, since I am nursing almost everytime I am on the computer.
Knowing warmer weather is in the very, very near future.

Gabrielle's 3 month check up

2009-03-04T17:53:00.003-05:00

Can you believe it? Three months already? Man the time is going by way to fast, even with the sleepless nights, and insane days, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Gabby is now 11.14 pounds, 22 inches tall. She received two more shots so she is a bit out of it today, and we go back again on the 7th of April. She is most definately teething, the bottom gums have two white spots on them, and she is sucking on her hands so badly that they are red, it seems to be uncomfortable for her to nurse also. Tylenol will help, I'm going to get her some teeting tablets also, and maybe one of those icey teething suckers.

She is able to pull herself into a sitting position if she is elevated already, I'm looking into getting her one of those bumbo chairs to help with that, she doesn't want to lay down and miss out on the action around her, she is also holding her head up really well when I carry her, this is great, because she can use her exersaucer soon. I hope she loves it as much as Emma & Kailee did.

Emma had school pictures today. I can't wait to see them. Tomorrow is another busy day for us!

Some Milestones

2009-03-03T19:06:00.001-05:00

Gabby has most definately found her hands. She loves to hold them together, we have started calling her the mad scientist! (Working on getting a picture of that).

She also sort of rolled over today, I say sort of cause it was on the couch which is much easier to do it on than on a flat surface, I can only imagine that the real thing is coming soon. All of a sudden she loves to be on her belly. She can also pull up her head and shoulders when leaning on a pillow, she is getting so big and strong!

Emma is the best big sister, she has caught on that lately Gab does not like to be alone, and wants to be held, so when I need to get up, she sits on the couch with a pillow on her lap and holds Gab for me, of course I'm not far away, and we are constantly talking while this is going on. She is just the best big sister, sadly though, she was initiated the hard way today, Gabby threw up on her!

Makes My Monday - A Rare Snow Day

2009-03-02T17:28:00.004-05:00

So the forecast was surprisingly correct! I was up this morning at 5 to feed the baby and decided to wait around and check out the news, prepared to make the decision that Emma would not be going to school today, therefore missing her first day of school, which just saddened my heart, I mean this kid even got sick during spring break and didn't miss school, how can she miss her first day because of snow.

To my massive surprise at exactly 6:00 this morning, the news came through that schools were closed! I was over joyed! This is the first time in 5 years that schools were closed, and God only knows how many years it was before that, that schools were closed. If schools closed 3 times during my entire education it was a lot. Leave the 5 boroughs and schools close that many times in a month, let alone two decades. Needless to say, this makes my Monday!

Lou took the pictures while he shoveled, cause I wasn't going out there, not even to play, I'm not big on snow, and if the girls didn't ask, I wasn't offering, my goodness it's March for crying out loud!!

Check out twinfatuation.blogspot.com for more Makes My Monday posts, or to add one of your own!

Tickle Spot

2009-03-01T19:44:00.000-05:00

I found Gabby's tickle spot today, I can't get a full laugh but she's gearing up for it, it's under her arm! I hope to get it on video either tomorrow or Tuesday!